Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Day #2 - Identity

There's so much to say about her identity. In her brief 16 weeks inside of me she created so much warmth and happiness. She made me smile when I was sick. I was just starting to feel the flutters of her kicks.

When she was born still in the emergency room, the nurse told me I had a baby boy. It wasn't until two days later when I received the autopsy results that they told me my baby boy was actually the baby girl I had always wanted. 

In the first two days of my grief there was a lot to think about, name, funeral arrangements, obituary, etc. Since I was told she was a he, I had already named her Gabriel Victor… but then had to change all of the funeral arrangements and her name to fit who she really was. 

So what did I do? I named her Anabelle Luz and gave her her father’s last name. So I named her Anabelle: Ann for my middle name, and belle because she’s such a beautiful part of me. Luz means light in Spanish, and she truly is the light of my life. I will never forget the day she was born… very early on Sunday October 21, 2012… on her father’s birthday. She will always be a very special part of us.

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