Thursday, March 27, 2014

Day # 20 - Hope

Having dealt with infertility for many years and then all of the sudden falling pregnant with Ana, I’d be lying if I said I felt hopeful about having other children. This loss has put such a toll on me emotionally that some days I feel like there’s no hope for getting pregnant again. I keep saying I’ll lose the weight and I’ll get back in shape to have another baby but it’s a lot harder than I ever imagined.

For those that join this group in the future, my hope is for you to know YOU ARE NOT ALONE!! I will do whatever it takes for you to know that you are not alone and that you will make it through this alive. I know in the days after I lost Ana I had no idea how I could keep living without her. I have, one day at a time. Some days I didn't want to get out of bed, some days I barely slept. The days ran together. I couldn't tell the difference between life and what felt like I was dying too. But I made it. I'm a survivor. My hope for others is to survive as well.

Please know that if you never feel like you're alone or that you don't have anyone who knows what you're feeling... please know it's normal to grieve your child. It's normal to feel the pain and the deep sadness and anger. But then there also comes a time for healing. I think after a year and a half of grieving, I am finally healing. Don't be afraid to reach out... you can always reach out to me!

And remember, we are surrounded by our angels! <3

Photo credit: The Great Cosmic Shift Blog

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