This one is hard because I feel like I'm moving on without her. I know she doesn't want me stuck in 2012, dwelling on her loss. I know she wants me to be happy. I know she wants me to give back. In reality, I've grown a lot. In stead of moving on I'm living her memory. I want to keep her memory alive in the things that I do. This will also bring awareness to PAIL.
Before my loss, losing a child was unthinkable... I think to every parent who hasn't lost a child it is. You get past the first trimester and you think everything's going to be just fine. That's why I want to educate. I want to grow in my knowledge of pregnancy and become a doula. Then, maybe when I'm strong enough and have enough stillbirth/PAIL knowledge that I can start my own support group in the Fox Valley area.